Malka e Shan

shiamuslim replied to your post: shiamuslim replied to your post: shiamuslim… did u leave...

Sun, 19 May 2013 01:29:53 -0400

shiamuslim replied to your post: shiamuslim replied to your post: shiamuslim…

did u leave again? :(

I’m here and there— I leave and come back for little bits of time. But I haven’t forgotten, you need oppressing O_o

"Terrorism is a word with little content - it is a label for brutalities committed by ‘the enemy’,..."

Sat, 18 May 2013 22:30:46 -0400

“Terrorism is a word with little content - it is a label for brutalities committed by ‘the enemy’, and from which one’s own acts of destruction are exempted. It is an inchoate and emotionally laden concept, a semantic mirror of our dishonesty and a repository for everything about war that we would like to disavow. Making a sharp distinction between war and terrorism is at best a self-deceptive game.”

- David Livingstone Smith, The Most Dangerous Animal: Human Nature and the Origins of War (via thepeacefulterrorist)

yirmialtı

Sat, 18 May 2013 16:25:23 -0400

negelirelden:

I’d just like to add a clarification to what I asked Zilvia last night, on the topic of abuse. My point was not at all to imply that children should, as a matter of course, resent their mothers. Part of the emotion behind my post was driven by something I’ve posted recently on the topic of why I don’t begrudge my parents not giving me siblings. I feel like the argument that, as children, we should automatically be thankful to our mothers for being born no matter the circumstances is inherently flawed. We should remember that the commencement of our lives was not our choice- if anything, we should at least be grateful to ourselves, to whatever higher power (if you believe in one) for keeping us alive and continuing the lives we were given. But, especially in an abusive situation, arguing for loyalty to your mother simply for dealing you a hand you had no choice in is putting the blame on the victim.

If anything, we are reflections of our mothers’ choices. There is no harm in being grateful to our mothers for choosing to give us life- in fact, in healthy parent-child relationships, that’s an excellent point to focus on. But not all parent-child relationships are healthy, and there is harm in using that gift as an argument, as leverage for loyalty that might not always necessarily be warranted. Our mothers are people, too. They are fallible, just like the rest of us. And, in the cases where they succumb to whatever outside pressures drive them to abuse (as could any of us), it’s important to remember that, as people, it’s okay to deal with them as we would with any other abuser in our lives.

"Depression is useful—it signals that you need to make changes in your life, it challenges your..."

Fri, 17 May 2013 22:30:30 -0400

“Depression is useful—it signals that you need to make changes in your life, it challenges your tendency to withdraw, it reminds you to take action. To reclaim body consciousness tienes que moverte—go for walks, salir a conocer el mundo, engage with the world.”

- Gloria E. Anzaldua (via cielito-lindo)

"Nearly all U.S. clothing chains, citing the fear of litigation, declined to sign an international..."

Fri, 17 May 2013 07:17:37 -0400

“Nearly all U.S. clothing chains, citing the fear of litigation, declined to sign an international pact ahead of a Wednesday deadline, potentially weakening what had been hailed as the best hope for bringing about major reforms in low-wage factories in Bangladesh. Companies including Wal-Mart, Gap, Target and J.C. Penney had been pressed by labor groups to sign the document in the wake of last month’s factory collapse in Bangladesh that killed at least 1,127 people. More than a dozen European retailers did so. But U.S. companies feared the agreement would give labor groups and others the basis to sue them in court.”

- The Washington Post (via azspot)

mideastcuts: Iraqi dancers from a ballet and music school...

Fri, 17 May 2013 07:17:19 -0400

mideastcuts:

Iraqi dancers from a ballet and music school perform at al-Ribat Hall in Baghdad during an annual production marking the end of the school year, on April 25, 2013. Photo by Ahmad al-Rubaye / AFP

I am actually a failed attempt at abortion. My parents don't know that I know about it. Thinking back, it was so obvious when I was younger coz my mom would make me sleep in a separate mattress but my younger brother got to sleep with her. And she would blame me for all the crap she did and my dad would hit me (Asian families). My parents got separated and I don't live with my mom anymore. Anyway, thanks for speaking up for us. :)

Fri, 17 May 2013 06:57:00 -0400

Hello. It’s awful of her to have treated you that way, and completely inexcusable whatever the circumstances. I’m glad you were able to get away and safe now. All my love to you <3

Abuse is all the more traumatic when it comes from someone you trust, let alone someone who carried you around for nine months, someone with whom you have an inherent and unavoidable bond. Not to mention, you're right, nobody really had a say in being born, so how should we be expected to be thankful for that, especially if we're subject to abuse at the hands of those who forced us into the situation to begin with? That's... astounding, really, that anyone could seriously advocate that.

Fri, 17 May 2013 06:44:00 -0400

Exactly. (How do you always say things so perfectly)

leave-me-to-dehydrate: themindislimitless: stopzaynmalik2k13: why are white girls automatically...

Fri, 17 May 2013 06:36:27 -0400

leave-me-to-dehydrate:

themindislimitless:

stopzaynmalik2k13:

why are white girls automatically prettier than brown girls

lies. brown girls are better ‘kay

What about yellow girls?

Of course! And if we’re expanding the list past a ‘desi girl convo’, then pretty much every single girl

except (exclusively) white ones X)

(dear OP, am I allowed to do this?)

stopzaynmalik2k13: why are white girls automatically prettier than brown girls lies. brown girls...

Fri, 17 May 2013 00:29:24 -0400

stopzaynmalik2k13:

why are white girls automatically prettier than brown girls

lies. brown girls are better ‘kay

So now before I lose all my calm over my exasperation over the passive-aggressivity of other people,...

Fri, 17 May 2013 00:22:47 -0400

So now before I lose all my calm over my exasperation over the passive-aggressivity of other people, I’m going to leave. Love y’all, take care, as always, you’re allowed to come vent if something or someone’s upsetting you (including me, *shrug*), you want to debate a thing, or just want company.

A note before I leave, since the topic of love came up (again) (because this topic if really important to me): we often all live lives when tricky topics come up instead of digging through to the heart of the issue we like going WAIT NO WHY CAN’T WE ALL JUST LOVE EACH OTHER. So instead of, say, addressing the abuse of children and their voices and their healing we throw blinds over our eyes because we’d really rather not look at an issue because we’re uncomfortable. Frankly speaking, that fixes nothing. And throwing that whole LETS EVERYONE LOVE EACH OTHER thing can make you temporarily help you feel better but it doesn’t fix anything and it often ends up being love displaced, put in the wrong place.

I get that abusers are a product of their society and as such they deserve love and care and therapy to heal them too but when we’re looking at a singular case of abuser/abused then yes, I will always place my support first towards the abused. Because we need to break that cycle of abuse now. They are the one enduring trauma and pain now, they deserve support and attention first. Peculiarly enough, we place attention way too often on the abuser more often than the abused, going as far as to completely ignore their needs as well. We, as communities, need to fix that.

Goodnight.

I can’t quit life but I can quit tumblr and sometimes when I think about this it makes me feel...

Fri, 17 May 2013 00:01:49 -0400

I can’t quit life but I can quit tumblr and sometimes when I think about this it makes me feel better.

firsttimeuser: Lu Nan

Fri, 17 May 2013 00:01:03 -0400

firsttimeuser:

Lu Nan

Thank you for protecting the people who don't respect their mothers. There are many people like me who have suffered years of abuse from their mothers hand.

Thu, 16 May 2013 23:41:00 -0400

I am really sorry you had to endure that and the abuser-sympathizing rampant in most of our society. And if you’re Muslim, I’m particularly sorry that our Ummah has failed you by refusing to address issues like abuse when they come up in our communities. You have my love and support.

aiyshawaiysha reblogged your post: aiyshawaiysha: themindislimitless:… I don’t have to say...

Thu, 16 May 2013 23:35:00 -0400

aiyshawaiysha reblogged your post: aiyshawaiysha: themindislimitless:…

I don’t have to say anything. Everything that needs to be said is already said in Qur’an and Hadith. Your understanding is given to you already by Allah(swt). You basically have the entire package. The words are:

1.”We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents; in pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth” (46:15).

2. ”Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor. And out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say: ‘My Lord! bestow on them Thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood’ “(17:23-24).

3. “We have enjoined on man and woman kindness to parents; but if they (either of them) strive (to force) thee to join with Me anything of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not’” (29:8).

4. “We have enjoined on man and woman (to be good) to his/her parents; show gratitude to Me and to thy parents; to Me is (thy final) Goal. If they (parents) strive to make thee join in worship with Me things of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not; yet bear them company in this life with justice (and consideration) and follow the way of those who turn to Me (in love)” (31:14-15).

YOUR understanding of these words is up to you. Whatever you add, comprehend, ignore, dismiss, reflect on, etc is YOUR choice. I have the right to repeat the commands of Islam. I’m not forcing anyone to love their mothers, lol.

Salaam,

1, sure, fine. That’s to do with childbirth though, and like I already said, childbirth pains do not excuse a lifetime of abuse…

2, as bolded: “as they cherished me in childhood”. Abuse is not “cherishing”. Abuse the the very opposite, it is an injustice. One of the fundamentals in Islam is fighting against injustice, anywhere, everywhere. Your ayat in this context is moot.

3. “BUT IF THEY STRIVE THEE TO JOIN ME ANYTHING OF WHICH THOU HAST NO KNOWLEDGE OBEY THEM NOT”. As in, if they force you to do something that’s haraam, then you don’t obey them, though you can reject whatever they’re telling you to do with loving kindness. The ayat does not speak on abuse, on parents doing something haraam that affects you and on your healing. But I do have:

Ibn ‘Umar said, “Allah has called them the ‘dutiful’ (al-Abrar) because they are dutiful (birr) to their parents and children. Just as you have a duty which you owe your parent, so you have a duty which you owe your child.” (Also see this whole article by Imam Khalid Latif)

Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah’s Apostle kissed Al-Hasan bin Ali while Al-Aqra’ bin Habis At-Tamim was sitting beside him. Al-Aqra said, “I have ten children and I have never kissed anyone of them,” Allah’s Apostle cast a look at him and said, “Whoever is not merciful to others will not be treated mercifully.” (Bukhari)

Also see this article.

The commandments of Islam are to love and respect your parents when they love and respect you too. You’re bringing this up in a context which is wholly irrelevant. In fact, when the OP post was about not shaming kids because they don’t love their parents, particularly in cases of abuse, you came in and said you think that not only do you think those kids should love their parents (mothers, in this case) anyway but that they owe their mother thanks, praise, and love. For carrying them through pregnancy. What about reminding abusive “mothers” that they owe their kid a serious apology for completely ruining not only their childhood but leaving them with emotional trauma to deal with for the rest of their life? What about remembering the part in Islam where parents owe their kids respect and kindness too, and that abuse is haraam?

Yeah, you can remind people to love their parents. But you don’t get to do show sympathy with the abusers of children on a post specifically made for supporting the feelings of abused children and not shaming them.

aiyshawaiysha: themindislimitless: aiyshawaiysha: firelightwaltz: hey guys friendly reminder...

Thu, 16 May 2013 22:43:00 -0400

aiyshawaiysha:

themindislimitless:

aiyshawaiysha:

firelightwaltz:

hey guys friendly reminder that not everybody has a good relationship with their mother so please try to avoid reblogging or posting things that might be construed as shaming people for not thanking/praising/loving their moms

thank you

sorry but ALL moms carried their children in their wombs, experienced difficulties and hardships because of them…

no matter what your relationship is with her now, you can never thank, praise or love her enough for what she went through.

no one owes anything to their mother because their mother chose to carry them through pregnancy— if the mother decided that, then that was their choice. that history does not cancel out if someone’s experiencing abuse at the hands of their mother. and in that case, they are not required to give an iota of love or respect to said mother, because abusers do not deserve love or respect. (To add: a lot of abused kids still do love their abusers, because abuse and recovery are complicated but nevertheless): shaming people because they don’t thank, love, or praise their mothers because of those conditions is horrible and unacceptable.

IF a mother even chooses to go through all the pain, then SHE STILL CHOSE TO GIVE YOU LIFE

She CHOSE to bring you into the world - it’s only because of her you’re even here - sitting here gratefully OR ungratefully

There is something heroic and honorific about appreciating what your mother went through during pregnancy and birth - EVEN if you dismiss her because of your personal experiences. i have my own fair share of “experiences” and those despite those experiences, despite what happened to me because of her, despite the impact her relationship with me had as a child…I still appreciate the hardship she went through because of me.

Being grateful and thankful for one thing doesn’t mean we can’t dismiss or look down upon another thing. Alhamdulillah, we are capable of feeling more than one thing, so it’s not a BAD thing to complement a negative feeling with a good one. Heaven lies beneath a mother’s feet ALWAYS - not just beneath a GOOD mother’s feet. The way you handle even a bad mother will still determine your way into heaven. I will never stop reminding people to be thankful, loving and kind.

Being any of those things is NEVER a bad thing.

okay, so you totally switched tracks in your paragraphs but fine

not everyone who gives birth gets to choose if they wanted to or not, btw. but regardless, nine months of your life when you take care of a body inside of yours does not make up for the years of physical or emotional abuse. if you make up your mind to be a mother, then you do it all the way— and as soon as you abuse your kid, you give up your title as mother and give up your right to love and respect. I will repeat that if necessary.

You talk about Islam teaching appreciation for mothers— when the mother does what they’re supposed to do and take care of their kids. Islam is also very much against abuse and injustices of all kinds. Islam insists on the attention and care for members of our communities that are hurt by injustices, and here you are talking about sympathy for their abusers.

I repeat: you give up your title as mother and give up your right to love and respect when you are abusive to someone who is (biologically) your child.

WHY ON EARTH SHOULD ANYONE BE GRATEFUL TO SOMEONE WHO MAKES THEIR LIFE MISERABLE THAT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE

with all due respect, whatever your experiences (and I can respect your opinion and decisions on your own experiences), you do not get to dictate how kids with bad relationships with their parents should life or feel. you do not have that right. you do not get to shame them for feeling and acting as they do, because you do not know their circumstances and experiences and you are not the same people.

"imagine this painting the phenomenal world there’s talk of dressing the body with strange..."

Thu, 16 May 2013 22:30:40 -0400

“imagine this
painting the phenomenal world
there’s talk of dressing the body with strange adornments
to remind you of a vow to empty space
there’s talk of the discourse in your mind like a silkworm
I wish to venture into a not chiseled place
I pour sand on the ground
Objects and vehicles emerge from the fog”

- Anne Waldman (via uutpoetry)

"The cat could very well be man’s best friend but would never stoop to admitting it."

Thu, 16 May 2013 22:10:17 -0400

“The cat could very well be man’s best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.”

- Doug Larson

shiamuslim replied to your post: shiamuslim replied to your post: shiamuslim… OMG THAT...

Thu, 16 May 2013 21:55:03 -0400

shiamuslim replied to your post: shiamuslim replied to your post: shiamuslim…

OMG THAT GIF IS SO CUTE. Ill make u Banana Milk Smoothies with some cheese crackers~ i have weird cravings ._.

you can keep the banana milk smoothies (not a smoothies fan) but the crackers would be nice thank you

(See how even though I’m oppressive I am also polite as fuck)

(Now make me crackers)

What is the name of that adorable oppression beast and where did you find it?

Thu, 16 May 2013 21:48:40 -0400

It’s Fennekin!