It’s always interesting when I come across a conversation where it goes “I won’t name any names, but…”

Not naming names is good. Sometimes. What I mean is, there’s always a right place and time for doing something, saying something, talking about something. At times it feels like people don’t know what the right place and time is. It’s even more interesting when you think about the culture of abuse we all live in and enforce, and then it gets interesting. People often will not name names of the perpetrator, but have no problem talking about the victim.

And, very often, will talk about the victim only to make their lives worse.

Here’s the thing: not naming names is good when you’re trying to protect the victim of something. That’s a good idea. That way things won’t go back and further hurt them.

On the other hand, the person who caused the hurt need no one to protect them. It’s not a matter of “saving face/ honour/ not starting trouble”. If someone starts a problem, people ought to know who it is so other people know who to protect themselves from.

Oh, and people.

It’s not nice to spread rumours and gossip about people when it could further hurt them.